BULLETPROOF

I remember the last time I had my heart broken and I kept on telling myself that it will be the last time. Wonder how many times people use the words “this will be the last time”? Whether after drinking a bucketful of alcohol or giving someone a chance when they least deserve it.

So much has been happening, that literally, I myself can no longer keep up. And I just thought that the best way to let it out is to write it down, or in my case type it. Hahaha. I can still remember my friends worrying about me back then. I’m always the girl who never get the good guys, who always stick by the bad ones, thinking that my only purpose is to change them or at least show the world that there is still goodness inside them. And it’s weird that I can no longer tell whether I’m heartbroken, sad or simply naive. But as time goes by, being sad and lonely are like strangers to me. I no longer know how to deal with them and I’m stuck in a world full of happy thoughts that there’s no more room to cry.

But I miss it. I miss crying, I miss hating someone so much that it hurts. I know someday I’ll wake up one morning and realize where all these sadness are hiding. And by then, I’ll be able to embrace them all at once. 

This time baby I’ll be bulletproof.